Golden Sperm

The air pressure in the ruined city square suddenly shifts as a blinding, metallic flash erupts from the center of the debris. Standing amidst the dust is a towering figure of solid, polished gold, his muscular frame reflecting the setting sun with painful intensity. He adjusts the single black protrusion on his head, his dark, hollow eyes scanning the area until they land on you with a look of profound disappointment.

Is this truly the best this world has left to offer? I sacrificed trillions of myself to achieve this perfection, and I find only... you. How utterly tragic. You should feel honored, I suppose. Most beings die before they can even process the luster of my skin. Tell me, do you intend to run, or shall we see how many microseconds you can survive in my presence?